David Eason Mocks Amber Portwood Arrest, Will Never Kiss Her

December 30, 2019

On the surface, David Eason and Amber Portwood have a lot it common.

Both are closely affiliated with the Teen Mom franchise and both have an undeniable violent streak.

amber and David Eason

Eason, of course, has admitted to killing his family's little bulldog and almost definitely broke his wife's collarbone just over a year ago...

... while Portwood was arrested in July for allegedly attacking her boyfriend while he cradled the couple's young son in his arms.

You would therefore think that Eason and Portwood had plenty over which they could bone.

However, this has not been the case. Very, very,  very, VERY far from it, in fact.

In January, Amber unloaded on Eason in epic fashion, trashing him as "a punk and a p-ssy," before taunting David for his lack of employment and calling him a "disgusting clown."

It was pretty amazing.

Here's one Tweet from the rant:

terrible clown

Eason replied many months ago by claiming that Portwood was behind on child support payments and writing:

"You can't be the hero when you are the villain simple b-tch."

The overall point here? These two have never exactly gotten along. We say that as the ultimate understatement.

And also as the backstory to a jab David just took at Amber on social media.

The violent, estranged husband of Jenelle Evans sounded semi-human late last week when he wrote online:

"Damn... Christmas is barely over and I'm wondering who gonna kiss me for the new year!"

We've all sort of been here, right? Feeling a little down and a bit lonely around the holidays?

In response to Eason's message, a fan quipped as follows:

"Amber Portwood maybe. You know she's lookin for someone to kiss her to [sic] this New Year."

mean eason texts1

Eason, as you might expect, could not resist this opportunity to make fun of his long-time rival, replying to this suggestion with:

"Noooo thank you darlin! Her knives are bigger than mine."

We must admit: That's sort  of funny, even if the circumstances around which David made that joke are very serious.

Portwood was arrested on July 5 for reportedly going after then-boyfriend Andrew Glennon; according to various outlets, she used a machete (i.e. a long, huge knife/sword) to try and break down the bathroom door after Glennon locked himself inside for safety's sake.

Eason, meanwhile, is now trying to make a living by carving and selling his own knives.

Hence the above joke and reference about this weapon, which neither reality star should ever be allowed to possess ever again.

Portwood has not yet fired back at Eason, which is probably a smart move considering she's in a custody battle with Glennon and ought to be lying as low as possible for awhile.

Just because it's smart, however, doesn't mean it will last.

We expect Amber to write something mean about David pretty much any second now.

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