From the moment the world learned that Dimitri Garcia is dating Amber Portwood, there were widespread attempts to warn the poor guy abut what he's getting into.

After all, it was less than a year ago that Amber was arrested for domestic assault after she attacked Andrew Glennon with a machete.

But against all odds, Dimitri and Amber are still rolling along.

In fact, recent episodes of Teen Mom OG showed the couple enjoying what is -- by Amber's standards -- a relatively normal and healthy relationship.

Yes, Amber made Dimitri take a lie detector test and tag along on one of her therapy sessions, but Amber's "normal and healthy" standards are much lower than most.

Anyway, these days, Dimitri is back in Belgium, and Amber is essentially living out a season of 90 Day Fiance. 

As The Ashley's Reality Roundup points out, Garcia is still expressing his love from afar with weird pen doodles and sappy hashtags.

That would probably be more impressive as a love language if Dimitri were 14 and not 40, but at least he's defending Amber against "the haters," which seems to be the number one sign of loyalty in her eyes.

When some of his followers suggested that Dimitri is only interested in Amber for her money, fame, or US citizenship, he clapped back in meme form.

“I am not impressed by money, followers, degrees or titles,” the now-deleted post read.

“What impresses me is honesty, kindness, generosity, integrity, and humility.” 

Needless to say, Dimitri set himself up here, and his followers were quick to point out that Amber  “has none of those qualities” and is “a danger to all men and children.”

Dimitri replied that he is “making the right choice,” as though that would shut them up.

Clearly, the man knows nothing of the persistence of American trolls.

“ … Honestly thank you for your advice,” he added in follow-up response.

“I’m sure she is not the person people say,” he continued, adding that he believes “people should get to know the person before judging.”

Apparently, Garcia is not aware that his girlfriend has been on a reality show for like a freakin' decade.

"People are judging because they’ve seen her behaving like a lunatic with their own eyes,” one follower told Dimitri, adding, “She’s awful.”  

When other followers slammed Garcia for being a gold digger or for leaving his kids in Belgium for three months to pursue his relationship, he very mildly clapped back.

Firstly, I have a job so I have money,” Dimitri argued.

“Secondly, what do you know about my life with my children? Are you sure they’re not with me? Again people judge someone on saying and not on fact," he continued.

"You don’t know anything about me or my financial and family life.”

Someone tell this guy he's gonna need to toughen up a bit if he's planning on welcoming both Amber and her haters into his life.

“I’m okay with your history,” Garcia's final post on the matter of his relationship read. “It made you who you are. And I happen to be in love with who you are.” 

Unfortunately, it's the same past that made her think a machete is a useful tool for settling an argument, so keep your head on a swivel, pal!